I've been violated

*****Note of caution, I'm a little freaked out so this may sound like something Tripper would write.****

I know I'm not the first or last cat to be violated but it was not fun. They stuck that thing up my butt and it was horrible! I tried to wiggle away and purr but it didn't work because the Lap Lady was holding my neck scruff.

Then the VET was going to put me in the SINK and give me a BATH!!! I swear he was so I had to climb up his shoulders and sit on them (he is even taller than the Tall Man!) *Note from LL: he was trying to distract her so he could hear her heart beat because she purrs too loudly*

Then he stuck me in the arm and it HURT and then it oozed out because he just went right through my skin flap on my front right leg so he had to stick me AGAIN and I got this huge fluid welt thing but it seems to have gone away now.

They said I have to go back in 3 weeks for my rabies shot. I do not want to get stuck again!!! This is torture.

I also have my official stomatis diagnosis which is of course related to my herpes virus and my meezer-jeans. I tried to tell them I do not like to wear clothes and if I did I wouldn't wear jeans but then I thought if I had to wear jeans I guess meezer-jeans would be OK. But because of this stomatis I have to have pulse anti-biotics every month to help my gums and teeth.

Watch out Lap Lady- icky liquid is coming your way by way of my mouth when you try to give itto me.

Terrorized Tuesday

Ugh, so she put me in the PTU and took me in the grey machine and we went to the VET!!! I yelled at her the entire time in the car to let her know that it was not cool! When we got to the office the Lap Lady let me out in the lobby because she wanted to pet me to let me know it was OK. It was NOT OK. Well, the women there all told me I was beautiful and that was very nice. Then the VET (not the usual VET but I've only met him 2 times anyway) came out and took us back to the exam room. After clinging to the PTU for dear life, they got me out. Here I started my purring routine.

Purrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr! I think it worked because they didn't stick that thing up my butt OR poke me with anything! I guess I really made a good impression. Stacie (the vet tech) has a Devon Rex and a Cornish Rex and she just thought I was awesome! Her one kitty's name is Kona the Hut because she weighs 13 lbs! Imagine Daisy weighing that much!!

Dr. Dym felt me all over and said that I am a very healthy cat and I eat the best foods possible. He is a really well respected home-pathetic vet and he gave me a good looking at. The bad news is that I have immuno-suppressive gingivitis or something. Since that is the start of the digestive track (he said from the mouth to the butt!! He said a bad word!) that it makes sense that I might have irritable bowels (IBD). I didn't know bowels could be mad! It is either that or a food sensitivity. So I get to take these STINKY pills. They are made of things like bovine liver and duodenum and other stinky things. They're supposed to to be chewable but there was no way I was chewing them. The Lap Lady made me swallow them!!!! I then have to change me "protein source" from turkey to something like venison or duck or something but stay with Innova or go to Pet guard.

He talked to the Lap Lady for like 18 hours while I sniffed around the room and leapt on and off of the exam table. I kept purring the whole time. He talked a lot about foods and stuff and I just wanted to go home!!! He said she has to bring him a sample of my poo.....so I'm getting followed to the box every time I have to go.

So we'll see how it goes but not to worry, I don't have an eating disorder and the Lap Lady is not trying to starve me on purpose. Maybe I'm just really worried about Mao being out on the lam!!

Oh, and I weigh 8 1/4 lbs. My breeder says that is actually not bad for my build. She said I have more of a male OSH build as I'm really long and tall so that is an OK weight for me. The Lap Lady thinks I should be 9-10 lbs and that I do look thin as my spine is sticking up a little and she can see the points of my hips.

When we went out to the car the Tall Man was waiting for me! He was very nice and talked to me a lot. Then the Lap Lady dropped the Tall Man and me at home while she went riding. How nice of him since today is his birthday!